Let's Give y'all an Update

My dad died in May, had to put my dog to sleep the day after my dad died and that totally sucked as well.  My daughter Samantha got sick in May and thank God I took her in, she may not be here today had I not.  My Aunt died a week after my daughter got out of the hospital. My beloved Aunt Mary, the only sanity in my insane world of trauma, loss and happy times.  The one woman who kept me going when I wanted to give up.  Suffered depression for months after and I can see a glimmer of hope in the distance.

My daughter Megan is moving out and going 6 hours away from me in Arizona and I am so very sad. This is the first time I will be alone. So tired of being alone, Steve died 18 years ago...come on, when is it my turn?

Tired of the Democrats in office, they fucked this country up big time.  Hoping on November 5th, 2024, America get's it right. You may not like Trump but at least he's for the people and not against them. 

Whatever

Wow.....to say that I am just in wonder at the entitlement felt by the people in the USA is an understatement.   Let me start with the schools...students, you are not in charge. Rules are their for you to learn self-control and it is apparent from your actions of late that there is no discipline in your lives other than what the schools give you.  It takes a team and there are missing team players.

The school is not a prison, you've just become accustomed to complaining until someone changes something for you.  Well sweetheart, in my world I'm changing not a thing for you.  Rules are rules, follow them.  You are cheating yourself by going on-line and not getting the experience you need. We all went through school from K-12 and we all survived.  

Seriously, grow up!

April 4, 2024

It has been awhile since I posted, life is very busy.  In 2023 I lost my Mom to cancer unexpectedly.  A few weeks ago I lost my Dad, and the day after that I had to put my dog down.  It has been rough for awhile now.  Now, I find out my beloved Aunt who I love more than anything, is in the hospital.  The tragedy of getting older is that you start losing those you love one by one and its heartbreaking.  Trying to adjust to this and it is not easy. It is bad enough I lost my husband 16 years ago and I still remain single, it near broke me.  While I am grateful to God for my children, grandchildren, his family and my photography, I am sometimes left with a sad feeling of reality.  

So starting today, I think I may just change a little bit about my photography.  I want more realism and life, while keeping it professional looking and creative.  I think I am a story teller and it is time to find that calling and incorporate it into my photography. I have so many ideas that I have yet to do with my photography, I can no longer wait. With the recent deaths and my Aunt's hospitalization, it is time!

Have to put my Faith in God that whatever he has planned for me, I make him proud. 

Sometimes you have to take the Plunge

It has been awhile since I posted anything on the blogger, but it's ok.  Sometimes you need to take a step back and try to figure out some things.  It's 2024 already, January 8th to be exact.   The two-week break from work was amazing but I found myself defeated by life.  My 2014 Hyundai has cost me an excess of about $4000 in a few shorts year, most of it being in 2023.  I just paid off $1038 loan to have it fixed and then, I would of had to put  more into it  Tired of sitting around and not being able to explore the world around me was rough, especially having two-weeks off.  So, I took the plunge and bought a 2024 Kia Forte.  If you think it was an easy decision, you would be wrong and I was literally shaking signing the papers.  It is a large expense I did not want on my plate right now but when I started thinking about it, the money I had put into the car was enough for quite a few car payments. I should have listened to my oldest daughter "Mom, you are putting way too much money into the car just get a new one."  Boy, was she right and I should have listened.

So now I have this big payment in a time when the interest rates for things are ridiculous thanks to our worthless President, Joe Biden thank you for ruining America.   I will continue to pray for our country for this mishap.  Back to my payment.  It will be rough but my peace of mind now is so worth it.  Being able to up and go, it is a blessing.   There are things I can cut back on and I already have.  My friend Nina also enrolled me into a financial workshop and after my first video lesson, I am hooked and I am grateful.  I will make this work and I will be able to afford it, tighten the belt is what I say.

Well, there you have it!  Happy Monday back to work for me!

I just can't with the US

 Sigh, where do I begin?  First off, everything is completely my opinion of course.  What has America come to?  We are built two ways, male and female.  We cannot be built any other way. It is the absolute truth and you can't argue out of this.  You either have a vagina or a penis.  Period, that makes you male or female. It makes you a her, she, him or he.  There is nothing else.  If you want to identify as a different gender, go for it.  We never had a problem until you started with them, they, he, it, dog, cat. etc.  There is no point to it.  What happened to us?   Lack of faith happened to us. 

Do people not see what is going on around them?  Man, revelations is playing out in the handbook of life.  Seriously look around, open up  your eyes and take off your rose colored glasses and see.  The euphrates river is drying up.  Messed up weather patterns.  Now we have aliens, which are supposedly actually demons.  Evil is no longer hiding.  It is straight out in the open.  Africa, Russia and China are all forming alliances.  Africa is cutting off natural gas to Europe.  

America used to be a Christian country with strong religious belief, family ties, moral values and neighbors helping neighbors.  No longer is this true.  Everyone is offended, people are openly worshipping Satan. Children are disrespecting teachers and staff in school.  Cursing is the preferred language and abortion is considered the right thing to do if you don't want a baby. 

I'm just in shock.  We worship musicians and actors. We believe in Angels but not God.   Sex trafficking is out of control and people are offended by a movie that draws attention to it.  We reprimand teachers and not students.  We allow this type of behavior and it's no the children's fault, we raised them that way. I am grateful I raised my children with discipline and accountability.  That's one of the main problems right there.

I am sad for our country as we will be invaded some day, so find God now. 

Christmas Weekend 2022

There are a lot of things I am thankful for and my children and grandchildren are one of them.  The holidays are hard for a lot of people and I am one of them.  It may come as a surprise to some but it takes pep talks each morning to myself so I can function.  I have been told by well-meaning people to be thankful for all that I have, and I most assuredly am.  I get told that maybe medication will help, tried and failed.  The thing I suffer, as with a lot of people, is heartbreak.  When you lose someone you love it never leaves you, you live with the pain and it becomes a part of who you are.

Happiness, its a moment and I do have a lot of happy moments.  Contentment is what I feel when I am at home, it is hard to be anywhere else to feel that.  Yet, I truly find each day something to be thankful for.  Someone once told me that I am strong, I do not feel strong.  Someone told me that I have done well, it is hard for me sometimes to see that.  Yet, I keep moving forward with hope and love for all the blessings that I have.  

Yet, I can't help but feel bitter about what was ripped out from under me, my husband.  Still single after 15 years and not able to find someone to at least understand me or give me what I need so I have now come to accept the fact that only I can help myself.  So I wake up each day, count my blessings and find another reason to get out of bed. Strong?  Maybe.  I'm just used to things being difficult that it makes it seem easy to other people how my life is.  I don't complain about it either, no need.  Just being thankful each day!  This holiday was a very thankful thing for me, my kids were all together.

Updates

Trying to figure out what I need to update you all on since my last post, not that there are many people on here. I ended up going to Sturgis, SD to the Biker Rally and hung out with the Mickey Utley Band.  I had the absolute time of my life, it was not only amazing to see friends again but to cross this off my bucket list. I made new friends, I saw new things and I took some time off to drive to Mt. Rushmore and see that for the first, I was blown away by the beauty of South Dakota.  Blessed.

My business is kicking off pretty good, learning a lot about Photoshop and even lighting.  I am grateful.  There isn't too much to report but enjoy a couple of images I took recently.